Older women are commanded to teach younger women about men.
Amazon.com: Bill and Roberta Taylor: books, biography, latest update
Bill Taylor – Marriage Under Threat: God’s Simple Plan of Marriage
Older women are commanded to teach younger women about men. Lesson #1 is that when a man says he loves her, he wants to bed her. Jacob worked for Rachel’s father for seven years. He saw her regularly; they ate together, talked, and did things together. Why wasn’t this enough? Why did he want to marry her?
And Jacob said unto Laban, Give me my wife, for my days are fulfilled, that I may go in unto her
. Genesis 29:21
Jacob wanted to marry so he could have sex with Rachel; God and custom required marriage before sex.
A woman must know the difference between being wanted and being valued. Rachel knew that Jacob valued her enough to work for her father for seven years to earn the right to marry her. How about Leah?
God gave us the Book of Ruth as a romance novel: a poverty stricken widow goes to a strange land to find God, works hard, shows virtue, marries a rich guy, and becomes an ancestor of Jesus. As a widow, Ruth knew what men were all about, but she followed when Naomi told her to ask Boaz to marry her. When Ruth got back from the party and told Naomi, she got the best older woman advice on getting married you’ll ever hear:
Then said she, Sit still, my daughter
, until thou know how the matter will fall: for the man will not be in rest
, until he have finished the thing this day. Ruth 3:18 The best advice on getting married there is.
Boaz wasn’t thinking of marriage, but when Ruth suggested it, it was such a good idea he ran out the next morning and married her. Why? Because he wanted her. If a woman gives a man rest outside marriage, her value falls (Pr. 31:10[14]). What would marriage give him that he doesn’t have? Why take on responsibility? If he takes her without marrying her, how can she trust him not to take some other women? If she gives herself to him without marriage, how can he trust her? A man will marry if he wants her badly enough and marriage is the only way she will let him have her.
If a woman’s on the pill, a man feels she expects to have sex, so why not with him? If she isn’t on the pill, she can say “No, I’ll get pregnant. Not unless we’re married, and I won’t marry you unless you grow up and get a job.” That’s taught in Gen. 24:67[15]. If a man’s offer to a woman doesn’t include food, clothing, and shelter, it’s not Biblical. If he can’t pay for her, all he can do is play with her and discard her. God hates that!
Women must also be taught that God created them to be His treasured gift for one man, not sex toys who wander from man to man seeking love. More support from Hooked:
“Those who abstain from sex until marriage significantly add to their chance for avoiding problems and finding happiness.”[16]
“. . . we know that people who have had sex before they entered into marriage have a higher divorce rate than those who had not had prior sex.”[17]
“. . . the inability to bond after multiple liaisons is rooted in the fact that our behaviors actually physically change our brains. The pattern of hooking up and breaking up and hooking up again can eventually override the natural bonding that occurs between two intimately involved individuals.”[18]
“. . . love, on a biochemical level, is a lot like addiction. The healthy addiction of a lifelong monogamous sexual relationship even has measurable physical benefits.”[19]
Some tell women not to kiss because kissing may give a man ideas. That’s wrong. Men don’t get ideas, men have ideas. Kissing can give her ideas. When both parties have the same idea, it’s hard to stop.
Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman
. 2Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. I Corinthians 7:1-2
From an experiment on hugging, we also know that oxytocin [a hormone that draws men and women together] is naturally released in the brain after a twenty-second hug from a partner.[20] [emphasis added]
“It was the hardest thing we ever did, but we’re so glad we waited. We had to talk through our disagreements. We couldn’t just feel close by having sex; we had to really work things out.”[21]
“The hardest breakup I ever had was with the first person I had sex with. Fifteen years later, I still don’t think I’m over him. I still dream about him and think about him and compare every guy since then to him. I’m married now and I feel like it’s a threesome in my heart. He is still there. It is like he is a part of me and I still can’t get over him.”[22]
After Marriage
The Song of Solomon explains the principles of maintaining a happy marriage.
1) There is no criticism at all in the Song, only praise in mind-numbing detail. Husband and wife are constantly looking for little things about each other to praise and appreciate. The way they praise sounds odd, but you can re-word it to make sense to your spouse. Married people need constant praise, support, appreciation, and affirmation from each other. Thank God for marriage and for your spouse!
2) It starts with the wife praising her husband for getting physical with her (Song 1:2[23]). Feeling appreciated by his wife makes a man more willing to take care of her and to appreciate her by praising her. What will happen when a wife praises her husband for kissing her? Sex exalts a man:
Which is as a bridegroom coming out of his chamber, and rejoiceth as a strong man to run a race
. Psalm 19:5
3) The husband is totally involved with his wife. He tells everyone that she’s uniquely perfect:
Thou art all fair, my love; there is no spot in thee
. Song of Solomon 4:7
My dove, my undefiled is but one
; she is the only one
of her mother, she is the choice one
of her that bare her. The daughters saw her, and blessed her; yea, the queens and the concubines, and they praised her. Song 6:9
He’s so addicted to her that he doesn’t see other women as women, only as people.
4) The wife has the security of knowing that her husband belongs to her:
My beloved is mine, and I am his: he feedeth among the lilies. Song 2:16
I am my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine: he feedeth among the lilies. Song 6:3
What must a man do to convince his wife that he belongs to her?
5) The wife recognizes and encourages her husband’s desire for her to strengthen his addiction to her:
I am my beloved’s, and his desire is toward me
. Song 7:10
She asks her mother for advice:
I would lead thee, and bring thee into my mother’s house, who would instruct me
: I would cause thee to drink of spiced wine of the juice of my pomegranate. 3His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me. Song of Solomon 8:2-3
Her mother tells her to welcome her husband into her body whenever he wants her. Giving herself when she’d rather do something else is what submission means. She has more capacity than he; she can drain off all of his sexual energy. She can say they could do it more often if he was in better shape; exercise helps him live longer. Her gladly encouraging his possessiveness makes it very hard for other women to get his attention, but if she sends him off to work loaded, he’ll be tempted to get a fix from another women (Pr. 6:28[24]).
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 33Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself
; and the wife see that she reverence her husband. Ephesians 5:22, 33
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands
, as it is fit in the Lord. Colossians 3:18
Favorites · April 1 at 5:05 PM · The latest research on the human brain shows how men and women connect.Our brains can be flooded with dopamine when a man and woman interact. Any interaction can trigger neurochemicals which change a couple’s brains to bind them to each other.“Drugs such as cocaine and amphetamine target dopamine neurons. . . . love, on a biochemical level, is a lot like addiction. The healthy addiction of a lifelong monogamous sexual relationship even has measurable physical benefits.” Dopamine is the “pleasure hormone;” people badly want anything that generates dopamine. Men and women can easily become addicted to each other. Recovering from any addiction can be very hard.Being addicted to a spouse who treats you kindly helps you live longer, but an unkind spouse can cause a lot of harm. You must make sure the other person treats people kindly before getting emotionally connected.https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/…/gods-simple… explains the importance of kindness. Why would a man open his heart to a woman who hurts him? Why would a woman open herself to a man who hurts her?Kindness isn’t enough. Marriages can’t last without deep emotional connections but men and women connect differently. Making a man feel connected to her is simple but VERY HARD for a woman. Making a woman feel connected to him is difficult and scary for a man. Strong connections protect both parties from being tempted to connect to others. This one-page note explains how these connections work:https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/…/gods-simple… Women share their emotions freely but want physical privacy. Men freely share their bodies but want emotional privacy. They must each learn the other way of connecting and fulfill the other’s needs.This chapter summarizes recent brain research that shows that traditional marriage customs work out best for couples and their children:https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/…/gods-simple… . It’s part of a book, see https://a.co/d/fPHji3D Older women are commanded to teach the younger women about men to help them avoid grief – women their own age have no clue. This explains Lesson #1:https://successful-marriage.blogspot.com/…/gods-simple…
Recent Comments